I feel happy & blessed :)

blah blah blah

2008-03-08T05:38:00.000-08:00

blah blah blah
enough of many da pian today, im changing blog for SAFETY purposes because of SOMEONE.
bye people. thanks for being a supporter. i'll stop blogging for at least two months. LOL
see if i can tahan or not.
cause,
im the ang moh LIBAI
LOL

你走了我也不在乎

2008-03-06T06:40:00.000-08:00

我的心好痛
我掉泪你也不管
你了我也不会为你掉泪
因为你也不会

主啊，就让我在她的前面消
原来至今我们三个是玩八蛋，不是你的骄傲
在你的里我从来不是一个成功的孩子
只是个废物

rain rain go away

2008-03-05T20:21:00.000-08:00

rain rain go away
come again another day
little children want to play
rain rain go away

and today, I woke up at the earliest, at 2.14am, scaring myself and panting, oh gosh, I was having a social studies exam. LOL. having graduated from secondary school for like more than one year already. LOL. funny dreams I have.

and the other time I woke up was at 6.30 am.
for now, I declare myself, the early bird!

LOL!

ELF!

2008-03-05T02:36:00.000-08:00

and this are update of my hair.

I had those days of sexy long hair days,

short elf hair days,

normal girl hair like now :)

I love to smile

I love to be happy

those people who makes me cry ought to be executed nd put in prison.

LOL

okie, got to go, and Im going to church again, for prayer and praise meeting :) cause..YESHURAWKS :))

sleepless nights

2008-03-04T16:44:00.000-08:00

it really feels terrible to sleep so little everyday.
and get up so early in the morning. today is around six thirty.
today I suddenly woke up at 4.22am, yesterday was 4.45am, and the day before was 4.55.am.
and the next time waking up is already six
and its no wonder that

-headache is always there
-acne's getting worse
-heavy eyebags hanging on my eye
-cui-ness getting severe by the day
-fear gets the grip of me

and dont even mention about how I feel each time I wake up with a dream, then to realise, its fake and it seemed so real. man, I just need someone to tell me, its oki. frowns*

my heart and my soul
I give you control
consume me from the inside out Lord
Let justice and praise
become my embrace
to love you from the inside out

everlasting your light will shine when all else fades
never ending
your glory goes beyond all things
and the cry of my heart is to bring you praise
from the inside out ofmy soul cries out from
the inside out of my soul

and this shall be the song in my night when I cant sleep becuase I believe, praise is the most beautiful, in times of adversity. thankyou daddy God :)

hoonhoon loves you yeshu!

what'ever that it the cause of it, I pray that daddy God will just heal me and let me recover because i just need so much sleep. and can you believe it ? I am actually someone who take take two afternoon naps a day and I need around 16 hours of sleep everyday and now Im getting 3-4 hours of sleep everyday and with my so very pack de schedule, I'll get sick very soon and I just dont wante another round of seeing doctor straight five times in a month. and my low blood is getting worse by teh day. just yesterday, went out of the school with my school de LC play de people and when we were coming back, we need to climb a long flight of stairs before we can reach teh over-head bridge of our school. yes, I did, but I felt so breathless that I couldnt talk. I took deep breath but no useless. I rested but couldnt breath in or out any air. why like that?

Im freaking irritated with myself.
Lesser and lesser patience for myself.
God, why am I like this?

and God let me speak with werds that build people up and not ear them down. sorry if I have in any way, grieved your Holy Spirit :(

ar, how bad to start my day
boo.
emo-ish day
:(
I dont feel like going out

nvm. stay home is good. going ddown church later to see my dear pastor mark anyway.
in the weeks ahead, aso many thigns are gonna happen and number one on list is

-school choir performance at alumni lounge
-AS school LC play at OTC
-church good friday musical

all at one go, time is confirmed gonna clash somehow. and its time to prioritise time again.
I must be really sad. somehow I figure out that in this post, after typing for like so long, theres not even a single bit of this "LOL". heavy eyebags=heavy heart you see
nvm, its oki. I think school is gonna be so crazy for me. I have like LC play from 9-5pm and then choir pactise at 5-10pm. no break?? and in addition to my suddenly wake up in the middle of the night, I think Im so gonna fall sick soonish soon soon. nvm. its okie. its easy to forget someone too. yup, talk less and be occupied. be so very de occupied.

and now my number on the list is to start doing quiet time. havent been doig and am guilty of it is because Im really so tired and drained out, so much so that I fell asleep everywhere that I go.

I love the chiense song by jaychou 甜甜的and退后
reminds me of teh cute mingjay with me singing and acting cute. LOL
mingjay, where is your gay partner chia chia? and your dear dear kok kian? LOL
I miss you guys! :)
go out someday oki??

and jaychou look so cute singing the song tian tian de. LOL
cute song. I like! so very de much de lor. LOL

went to meet pastormark and pastor tay just now. and I guess, everything is fine now :)

and she goes "its okie, its alright, alice alice fight fight fight!"

cui morning

2008-03-03T20:02:00.000-08:00

cui-ness day begins with heavy eye bags.

today all my friends say I look very ah lian-ish all because of my yellow top together with my purple coulour de skinny jeans, three ear-piercings with bling bling studs and also, in addition to my big big earrings I wear,and my haircut including my bright yellow, blue and red nail coulour and oh man, they say, WAH! today you look very LIAN eh. oki lor, never mind lor.

ya, not the first time my friends say i look ah lian, so, that's so surprising. but I talk not ah lian one de lor. I use classy english and and I speak with great eloquence. LOL. like seriously.

and Im adele in the LC play. one of my friend said the character suit me. just like me. i went like wah liew, like that say cause its a little high and keesiao kinda chracter. good lor. nvm. i like can already :) LOL

apologize is the song of the song. very nice. I like.

i wante to go out with val.
i wante to go to the beach.
i wante to enjoy my sleep
i wante a cup of tall caramel macchiato like now
i wante to go on a shopping spree
i wante to buy more jackets, tank tops and nice cute dresses
and oh man, dinner and dance is coming in my twenty plus days time, acne and pimple, pls heal quicky
and pls pls, hair, grow faster faster, my frinch, you need to be more long and sexy and my bhind hair, pls grow nicely for i have no more money to cut my hair already. LOL

cui-ness day :((

2008-03-02T16:14:00.000-08:00

cui-ness day :(

RELEASE

2008-03-01T17:01:00.001-08:00

soul set free

twas grace I've found

1/3/2008

And before I forget or I get atrangled by my own cluthes of guilt and bitterness of unfirgiveness and allow it to birth into hared and something terrible, The gracious loving Lord saved me and set me free

And I will never ever forget this precious werds from the mouth of Pastor Daniel.

and it goes like this:

" Until you learn to accept yourself then is the day of breakthrough",

Pastor Daniel and Mabel, my youth leader repeated similiar werds that truck me so hard and accurately and which that was to explain the 800 plus friendster profile view. man, that really crazy la! and its within a month somemore. Im not ashamed of it. the werd is "self-seeking".

This is because, in everyone's life, attention need to be drawn. For me, I think its unconciously one. Maybe the reason is because I dont feel loved by the people around me. As the bible goes, love is not self-seeking you see what I mean??

As Pastor Daniel held my little small elf head in his fatherly hands, I felt a release, I felt a kind of father's love flowing through me and I really felt so loved by him and daddyGOd. If Im not wrong,I heard him crry for or because of me. What I've been through ever since last year summer. He said many many things that struck me. for like example, " You are/ you need to be secured in God alone." and I replied, saying" how do you know???" and just give a short reply saying" I just know" then, number two, He said " you never accept or love yourself". and by this time, Im alrady very cure, its something really prophetic and he really knows when he was praying for me. then I agreed with him, saying " yes, Pastor Daniel, I have never accepted myself for who I am"

It something really very important

I reallly remember this day. It the day of release and the dayof freedom frmo within and all is by the grace of God that his grace is more than suffiencient for me :)

And even Val said something which really touched my very heart. like, " you know, we've known each other for like 10 years? about more than half of our life?? It just really hurts to see you like this. We all love you and accept you for who you are. Dont listen to what other people are saying about you. Dont, and she repeated sternly with much sisteryl love, Dont listen to them. We're all waiting to see what comes out of this. you have to move on. really, let go and move on"

hearing this, tears welled up fully in my eyes and I cant help to allow the tears to roll down my eyes and we gave each other a warm hug. It really feels wonderful and great to know that people around actually cares so much for me. i was too naive to think that nobody ever bothers, so I dont bother giving myelf attention or to accept and love myself. and man, to this day, Im so wrong la! I ought to love myself. because the only way to overcome this, as what Pastor Daniel Had said, is to learn to love and accept yourself for simply who you are, then you will be able to forgive and love others more. And val said smething like, and one day, ten years down the road, or maybe even shorter, we dont know, you willbe able to share your story to these girls in the youth! and I so very agree with her, Becaue I know many will go through what I had gone through. Although It was very painful, I gained and learnt many many priceless and precious gift of lessons from God :)

and one more thing that pastor daniel said to me was, woman who are able to forgive and love are more beautiful even without anything on their face. yes! Its so true man :)

PastorDaniel, thankyou for being so nice and prayed for me like a father would to his child. Thankyou for helping me to overcome this hurdle in my life and I really feel so happy that everyday is worth living for. Because God loves me so much.

HOONHOON LOVES YOU PASTORDANIEL!

and she lay down her make up stuff, till necessary :)

cui-ness, sad-ness,tearful-ness

2008-02-29T16:41:00.000-08:00

and there are days where i just dont feel like blogging anything

what if cartoons got saved?

2008-02-27T15:58:00.000-08:00

recently, I found this song really amusing
called " what if cartoons got saved?"
its quite nice :)

and people,
its.........HOLD-LA-DEE-DAES!!!

MAN, 3 hours before exams, I was like " faster faster, I cant wait! I cant wait!"
and three minutes after exams, I was like" wow, Its unbelievable! ITS HOLD-LA LEE-DAES!!!!"

KINDA FUNNY.

i THINK i NEED TO CHANGE THE WAY I TALK
cause people finds me talkative and maybe irritating
and those people, you dont know what happened in the past, dont make any immature judgement
you people, have no right
I say this to your shame

ONE MORE DAY :)

2008-02-25T22:40:00.000-08:00

LOL

ICANT WAIT
ONE MORE DAY
AND IM FREE!

LOL

then I will really be a busy girl like what my deardear crystalchia says: YOU ARE A BUSY GIRL :)

weeeeeeee.
then I will really be so busy busy busy,
anyways, I LOVE BEING BUSY

LOL

HOLD-LA-LEE-DAES,
HERE I COME!

oki, time to sleep first. LOL

my heart is burning in anguish

2008-02-25T06:13:00.000-08:00

my heart is burning in anguish
shut up will you
you piss me off and spoil my night
i feel down
so i'll lie down
whatever that it, I nv treated you as my big sis at all.
shoo.
KNS.

cui day

2008-02-25T02:49:00.000-08:00

LOL

things that I never fail to do :) LOL!, its very lame. cause im aliceinthewonderlame. LOL!

I never fail to disturb everyone in the midst of exams with my piat piat piat sounds of my elf shoe and I shall disturb everyone with my newly bought sixty cents only yellow flip flops with bear bear printings. LOL. then I will like go. piat piat. PIAT PIAT PIAT PIAT PIATPIATPIATPIATPIATPIATPIATPIATPIATPITAPIAPIATPAITPAITPAI~!! my way to the toilet to peewee and refill my cute mickeymouse waterbottle.

LOL

and I never fail to take nap during exams. I dont usually do that. but ever since I got in TP, I did alort of short naps in between lessons, during lessons, before and after lessons. and even during exams. LOL.
and today, I had a 15 minutes nap.
LOL, everyone, you must see, I was very cui leh. study and slept at one last night and woke up at six plus. MAN, this is call cui-ness.
but not too bad. cause my handsome friend sihan slept at 3am and woke up at 5am to continue his studies. MAN, his is then called cui-ness like cui-ness until cannot cui.

SO, to take a break from all the cui, cui-ing and cui-ness, here am I blogging about the CUI.
LOL

I think exams made me funny, and perhaps crazy.
there sees to be humor hormone secretions everywhere even during exams and while write my answers, I thought of such answers. take a look and check out my cui and humor hormones in me

qns:
ans on the paper:
ans in my mine:

I gave my girlfwren a orange tulip today. lol. she was surprised man. lol .I love you ma, so must give you flower like a guy does. lol. kidding lar. kidding abut the part which i know you guys are thinking, omg! she's a LESBIAN! too bad, Im not! Im perfectly straight and aliceinthewonderlame has eyecandies like you all do. LOL! this time, she wins again! :)
oki, tell me, whoever doesnt has a eyecandy must be without eyes right?!!??! LOL!
alright, stop laughing and rolling your eyes, this is aliceinthewonderLAME. you cant do anything right. LOL. well add one more then. ROFL.

LOL
cui man. LOL!

I really cant wait for exams to be over.
oki, to relax myself, right now, let's think what to do after exams with those time in my hands.
LOL!

1. buyburfdae present for my girlfrwen denise
2. go on date with my girlfrwen crystal chia
3. glam girls go shopping! yea, save mre moey and go shopping like nobody's business. LOL
4. go beach with someone
5. go starbucks cause i miss my tall caramel machiato. and mister adorable, I bet you know what I mean. treat me oki!
6. go gym to train and really run. Man, I have really put on weight ever since Im outta dragonboat. fatty big tummy belly days can be really depressing one you know. LOL.
7. go run reservoir, east coast park, bedok stadium
8. do skipping, let 200 per day
9. really learn how to do hoop la hoop. for goodness sake, i think those 8 to 10 year old knows how and for goodness sake, I dont know and Im really not proud at all. I DONT CARE I MUST LEARN HOW TO DO HOO LA HOOP FOR GOODNESS SAKE!!!!!~~~~!~!~!~!!!!!!!!!!~~~~~~~~~!!!!!!
10. indulge myself in a sea of books and a cup of capuccino at east coast mc cafe. Its my favourite hangout place you see, you know.
11. go rollerblade with somebody who can rollerblade and not going rollerblade with people who cant rollerblade for nuts! LOL, it really piss me lots man! LOL!
12. start thinking about my art port folio
13. start thinking about my futuristic future of being a doctor( I'll update and tell you why later on in post today)
14. be a good girl and do housechore a home for MAN, its been ages since Im seen drenched in the bathroom washing clothes, or rather,I would like to think, the clothes wash me, sweep floor until its clean clean clean and I mean CLEAN. Mop the floor until the floor is shimery shiny. LOL
15. start writing those cards for the tp-ians
16. rally get back to God for QT.( God, forgive me man, its not that I dont want, but I always fell asleep and ta ta! its another day)
17. help out at youth and children ministry. MORE
man, I pray I can serve more, cause Im really well and all now. ILOVEYOUGOD!
18. buy something nice for my frwens, those whom I really love and cherish with my pay after I get my job. oh yes! I promise! first one on list: JONpa, MUITECK!, shannyBABE, VALthebigDARLING, eunicemysweetheartJIEJIE, emilydear, ivanAMALY, mingjaychou, mingjaydedearKOKKIAN,mingjaydeGAYPARTNERchiachia-KENG, 4jia4equalstoSIJIA :), sweetsweetcandice,
19. Learn to sing the song, apologize to D,A,SZ.
20. LOL, and the last thing on my list is to get a job and start working and start earning, crazily and madly and see money rushing, gushing into my bank account like the Suez canal. LOL

so many things to do, Man, Im excited
oki, exams, let's get over and done with
and HOLD-LEE-DAES-!! HOLaaaaaa!
HERE SHE COMES! :)

LOL

and she goes cui-ing and mug-ging again
two down and two more to go, come on man, bring it over man, jiayou man, hoonhoon hono lulu can do it man! LOL!

jesus, I will live for you, in everything I do.

LOL. LOL. LMAO and ROFL are my current hot werds that glam girls use :)

werd of the day

2008-02-23T22:27:00.001-08:00

werd of the day: cui
phrases of the day: I win liao de lor
feeling of the cui day: cui until cannot cui
weather of the day: hawt hawt BTH one de lor
hairstyle: not bad
study of the day: very bad, very lag behind, nvm, jiayou!
dog of the day: crazy dog
cat of the day: lazy cat
blog of the day: crazy blog
name of the day: lazy hoonhoon
cartoon of the day: mickey and minnie mouse
lover of the day: Jesus and crystal chia, my girlfrwen
drink of the day: water and cappucino
fruit of the day: kiwi fruit
food of the day: pineapple rice, thai style kangkong, claypot tom yam seafood soup
last werd of the day: cui

oki, let's stop playing, let's get back to work.

ten thigns that I hate

2008-02-22T15:48:00.000-08:00

and very funnnily, its all about myself

I hate to contradict myself

I hate to embarass myself

I hate to be jealous of what I do not have

I hate to be sick

I hate to lack sleep and be so very de cui

I hate to lie about things

I hate to say nasty things to my sisters

I hate people to scold me fierce fierce

I hate rainy weather and trapped w/o an

umbrella but thank God I had belindar ytd

I hate to waste money on things that I

buy but do not eat. like french fries. LOL

still feel cui

CUI

2008-02-21T07:02:00.001-08:00

this is for those who reads my blog
I only have one werd to say for today before I sleep today

CUI

2008-02-20T00:15:00.000-08:00

feeling a bit gan chiong because of the work load i left for revision for my sem exam. MAN, i really need those supernatural strength and wisdom and engery to keep myself alert and awake to be able to stardy thruout the day man. yes, I can. bob the builder yes we can! HAHA!
LOL
just finished my quiz like 30 seconds ago, man, my best result i could get was six out of ten points. AIYA, nvm la, i tried again and i got worse, so whats thepoint of trying again. HAHA. its demoralising you see.

feeling a little hawt cause of my feverish. HAHA! okie bbl to update more! now, friendstering and starying muggling mug mug more cui and more more cui!! hee!

canon in d day

2008-02-18T22:03:00.000-08:00

now im sitting in the library first fllor, comfortably on a blue chair listening to canon in d
so i shall start my study day with the son canon in d and i would like to dedicate to my god-Pa and my "PA" HAHA
what crap.
but really, she loves the two of them a lort! like totally!
hmm, one dy I'll really learn how to play and I will play for my god-pa, i presume that i allows me to call him that. Well, sitting in his car was a great ride too. I love his car cause have casting crowns music seh! HAHA!

I think I fell in love with another song, majesty

Had lunch wit good fwrens of tb01, they're really nice, you can really feel their truthfulness and genuine friendshpi and warmth towards people. esp, fave people like chia chia keng, kok kian the turtle, mingjay, YAOli, guoxiang cute cute, sijiejie, jessyCA, ZUL or ZOOlogical garden and many many more, they're really so nice people I think God has blessed me with. I LOVE THEM! HAW HAW, like totally!

so, Im a good girl, i have breakfast and I had lunch. Breakfast was that very nice thick thick small bottle of vanilla milkshake, and lunch was a forty cents bowl of kway chap, quite healthy until speaking about the fat fat oily oily chilli. but its very nice! like totally! and yali loves to dipped his chicken chop and fries into the chilli, sounds gross but its ncie cause I 've tried it too! HAHA!
man, i felt so bloated but eating kawy chap, half an green apple, three slices of guava, one packet of lemon RIBENA. and i bought my daily dosage of chocoLATE, and newspaper. cnt help it la, I LOVE to read and i think i read excessively. HAHA. people drink or smoke excessively, but i read excessively. HAW HAW, funny, hilarious, like totally. and I love to write, draw, coulour, PAINT too. They are loveed by me man!! like totally, AWESOME!

was listening to mr togepi lecturing and another one ear plug with melody's ipod cause it was so boring that i fell asleep before i put that ipod into my ears, man, I revived. like the song, tell teh world that Jesus lives, tell the world that, tell teh world that, and maybe that my fave fell in love song with today, majesty.

oki, I shall be a good grl and I shall return to my books and pens and notes and glam. Loe to study but i dont really like exams tho. HAHA!, eveyrbody, wish my all the best while studying, that i will not fall asleep like soonish soon soon oki! HAAW!
weeeee oh week

audacious! =D

and she's none other than
aliceinthewonderland
[so called the little elf]
machiam like some storybook man! like LOL< ROFL< or HAW HAW HAW! HAHA!

and there she goes, there sho goes again...
mug mug mug mug i drang a mug of drink and i went mug mug mug mug mug. like totally!
HAWHAW!

redleatheryellowleatherredleatheryellowleather

2008-02-17T22:56:00.000-08:00

I wore a very cute mini dress. I LOVE IT like totally man. HAHA, it is red in coulour and have big black greyish pockets which i found it like so cute! like totally!

Had a very dizzy and head dead morning. It was bad, terrible, horrible, unforgettable that kok kian bought me egg sandwich. He is just so an awesome friend too! LOVE you! I'll remember you always yar! haha! like totally!

met silas and his friend. man, i asked him to buy drink for me and he didnt hear and i wasnt like squeaky oki. she was like screaming and skrieking eh! i wante a drink! something like that. haha! overall, funny, hilarious!

had mushroom omelette, mushroom soup and one papaya, one mouth of atermelon and many slices of guava fo lunch. quite heavy yar? small things add up together is equal one heavy meal. MAN. I need o exercise and train up my body man. getting fatter nowadaes. eat and eat and eat and didnt work out is really bad for health lor. HAHA. how true de lor. like totally!
HAHA.

right now she's craving for fraser and neave's strawberry and chocolate milk! which rawks like totally man! it always do rawk my day man. so people, knw what to do when you see me yar?
hand me my afffff AN Ann strawberry and chocoLATE milk oki! weee!

i found out that kok kian is really a nice person. WOOT. God bless you my fwen. HAHA. random la this is. like totally! he has got that blig bling earring on his right ear, made him look so man. HAHA. Silas also. WOOOT. i like bling bling stuff,. I have many bling bling stuff too man! let me name some. earring studs, belty belt belt, hairBAND, hairCLIPS, ring that i lost in the church de sanctuary. MAN. sad man, i bought that bling bling ring for like one ninty. and Im nv gonna buy it again cause its my second time losing it. demoralising to wear a ring man. dont get married then. HAHA! kidding. like totally. // CHEY! HAHA

fel blue when i thought of what happened last night. I got werds that didnt help me. maybe a little but it stll dampen my soulish part of me, making me extremely pissed and emo-ish. Like totally. shall not go into details and well, i got scoldings la. and you guys know that, i hate to get scoldings for nothing. like when im sicked, spent over two hundred dollars of medical bills, you cant blame me right? i ahve been trying hard to take good care of myself, taking right meals at right time and even go on to the extent of eating the right and healthy food. aint i like a good girl or what? but still, i got scoldings that i hate it and it became, i hate them. MandD. not that i sadist but if you are the one getting those words like you are already ugly, dont need to put make up, in chinese, i think anything will feel sucky suck suck right?? HAHA I know, im right. no ones like to be scolding without a good valid reason, let alone me man. I really really HATE it to the very core of my soulish part of me man! like i'll not regret hating that man. EWWW. makes my blood boils and my veins thicken and might even burst. IRRITATING, FRUSTTRATING.
let change topics.

today is a nice fine day, wearing my fav dress and my DIY ballet flats, i just feel so perfect man. HAHA. LOL and ROFL. BUAH HAHA!

silas said i get high at night and i wnet like, yar, duh, cause the night is young and im young too im only eggteen, dont expect me to be sleepy now, i cant man. LIKE toally. HHAHA!
I think i make people arund laugh alort. esp, my dear LEEDEAR. actually her name is spelt lydia, somehow i prefer calling it LEEDEAR, have more meaning to that nice name man. LIKE totally. HAWHAW. Silas got that very nice bag which i think i like but may not suit for a little elf girl like me. AWW, nvm. then. I have my new bag, given by yuan baobao my workplace de friends. He;s very cute. round round face one. HAHA. KAWAII is his name la. WOOOO!

I always feel cold. My fingers I mean. they are just not obedient to temperature you see. So I always have jacket with me. or even many many carDIGAn. I like guys to wear cardigan leh. i think its nice. I like girls to wear big big jacket, I think its like so cute and adorable. HAHA really, have that style of their own. my style is jap jap one. that black and white stipped cardigan of mine with the tights will ust be perfect for my outfit tmrw yar. maybe. manybe not. I like to think for what to wear tomorrow and im not worrying. just like i love to design and mix and match you see. althought i always kope sweets at the mix and match at cheers or mini toons. HAHA. cant help it la. they're too nice to be seen, must be tasted and placed into my mouth. HAW HAW HAW!

I like this song forever, by paradise. Its veyr nice. the chorus goes like I sing sing sing for the blah blah reason, i dance danc dance, i dont know the lyrics you see. But, I still love my favve song, canon in d rock and classical., I learn to play it some day man.

okay, i think i have enough of idling, i think i need to get back to mug mug mug my books man. enough of slacking around. HAHA! mahs, heyish PEEEEE AIY here i COME!

and there she goes, there she goes again

smurf: la la la al ala ala la la la la
she: canon in d rawk on yeah! like toally!

she heart broke and she teared for the last tie and she weared, I'll not shed a single tear for my dad. you suck.

watching the stars, looking for my love in the universe

2008-02-16T06:50:00.000-08:00

elf express myself thru werds, actions and drawing, and maybe singing
telepathy she also can like
when you say nothing at all,
elf knows what you are thinking by looking into your eyes and hearing your heartbeat
romantic and sweet
isnt it?
LIKE totally :)

funtabulastic day

2008-02-15T19:26:00.000-08:00

holla!
tell yar something very interesting! to me i found it very uber fun and interesting!
i found my primary school tuition friend!
his name is SILAS!
so amazing~
my god, he's a hunk now oki!
he used to be that quiet and shy guy who brings a blue zipped bag with his spectables placed beside his pencilbox and he's really shy mind you.
and now, he has grown up into that huny hunk hunk, macho, fit fit and charming young man mind you! his attraction is. HAWT! haha. i taught him is HAWT! haha!

its really amazing cause our acknowledge is kinda weird and hilarious
it began with that time by which i fainted infront of business school, which was yar, very funny. and he came to the rescue. to that faint dizzy weakling little elf who was sqeaking without a sound and tears rolling down her cheeks simply bcause she doesnt wante to go to the hospital. well you see, im afraid of the needles and the fierce looking missy and horrible man eating doctors who for goodness sake do operation on your without your permission from you but from your parents but HALLELUJAH thank god i didnt have to go fr an operation even tho the lymph node in me wasnt good yar. HAHA
it was so fun. but at the hospi, it was, a horrible needle producing doctor poked thru my tiny teeny weeny whiny veins and didnt even ask me! it was so painful that tears came rolling down my cheeks again. come to think of it, i shed more than one litre of tears that day. that one single day. phew. so waste of my tear glands. HAHA.
I think my sense of humour is increasing by the day. practically everyone who sees me or talk to me have no choice but to go HEHEEE HAHA, you very cute eh~~~!!~~ thos kinda of things. initially I wasnt used to it, was feeling a little shy and like eeee errr, oki oki, enough, enough, dont overdo it. but now, I think im fine with it, like i say haha, the more the merrier. AH HAHA
interesting. and I met a friend who sacrificed his jacket for me. and his name is called chris. MAN, I tell yar, he almost made me cry. haha because he was so fierce to me! together with his big eyes, man, I was like, ok, you're a horrible fierece monster, Im not gonna talk or look at you. Im going home, there's dinner for me and mummy's waiting for me at home. like, bye friends, and bye, horrible looking fierce monster boo! and I walked away, with tiny fast steps. BUT later on, something happened at tampines interchange made me change my impression towards him. HAHA. we got down the bus and they wanted to go to MACS which i mistaken for MAX's house. and sadly, i walked away and they too walked away. and funny thing is , after one min, i started to feel a sense of lostness and sadness overwhelming bringing me near near to tears. ten i began to mumble werds in my heart, [Im sorry, I didnt mean it, you're not fierce, infact, you are very friendly to me, so friendly that I can be more friendlier than me, dont leave, I need you guys to be with me, I hate being alone, really, I do , I do and i thought of sz and I began to tear like crazily, like how much i missed you and thinking you must have forgotten about me,like totally, heart broken and wreching, I went around and round and round the interchange looking for chris and his friends.
infact, I LOVE CHRIS AND HIS FRIENDS
they're HAWT and CUTE. HAHA, i cant believe it, a fierce monster is HAWT AND CUTE>!?!??~!~~!! HAHA, yar, absolutely, hawt and cute, just like SILAS! haha!

later on my youth is having a youth event but salfy, i haven ask anyone beccause i was so sicked and busy the few days ago. man, i really hope my friends will be there. at least 2 of them, to make me feel better and less guitly ma. HAHA. God, pls bring someone for the evnt. pls pls, i beg yar with heart hearts melted for them and for your sake. PHEW, i pray that the evnt will bring them to Christ and be loved for the everfirst time that the unfailing love of LORD JESUS CHRIST will melt their very heart and be saved. SAVED. saved into your kingdom.
thankyou Jesus
in Jesus name, elf prays,
amen

and she waited for the time and chance to come by, dont say gd bye, say,wait. tiem will come by......

cold cold night

2008-02-15T07:54:00.000-08:00

vday was happening

2008-02-14T21:15:00.000-08:00

ytd was valentine's day
it as very happening and eventful
full of surprises and love
not with roses , bearbear or dove,
but with me into the hospital i dont love
filled with joy, and many bodyglove,
i felt i have nothing that i cant love
because everything i am was nothing but LOVE

seen the doctor five times a month
gotten four mc
and misses lessons more than anyone
if i can really do well during exams
that would be the miracle of the year
seriously
i fainted ytd and i had hunky hunks to carry me
nothing beats that man!
and i hae becca praying for me by the bed
and chongyong korkor drying my tears for me
and timothy to back up support me
and rayner there maybe to comfort me with his presence
and many TP staff to watch over me
and church friends visiting me
esp, mabel and Pastor mark
they popped by my place :)
i have nothing to say but thankyou and I LOVE YOU ALL!

now that im feeling better and well and all, i wish to study hard and give my al and give my best that i can can into my studies and God
for
Twas' grace I found
in you, alone
great is thy name and greatly to be praised

even tho there was any rosey rose rose or bearbear beary huggy hug hug, i still thank God for everything that had happened ytd
it was memorable and eventful, and the most apt werd to use is
HAPPENING
haha!

happy valentines to all my dear friends!
God loves you and so do i!

and she smile and say, aishiteru!

lymph node infection was bad :(

2008-02-12T06:02:00.000-08:00

dear God
Im trying to be positive you see
i get the priviledge to get lymph node infection at the age of eighteen, on the day of monday, on the date of 11 feb two oh oh egg. CHEY
it wasnt fun and kewl at all
it was PAINFUL la.
its something like a small round lumpy lump lump beside your throat
and when u swallow or eat or drink anything that you need to gobble down your throat, it kinda hurt badly
:(

sad sad sad sad sad sad sad sad sad!

worse thing is.
nvm, I shall no elaborate, otherwise, swimming pool come I dont know how man

she shall just wish that tomorrow will be a better day
she hope so

and she loves to drink china tea, she loves God-pa and she heart hawt people like michelle and jackson!

WEEEEE oh weeeeet i always have to slap my mouth to stop myeslf from whistling.
HAHA
gals may get the wrong idea you see
Im not a LESBIAN
by the way,
im more romantic that guys
I know how to sweet talk
CHEY!

HAHA, seriously i do, any guys wanne learn?
I charge 5 dollars oer sentence
confirm guarantee cpo your girlfriend will drool on you and they will cry for you man
100 percent comfirmation man!

HAHA!

hilarious is the werd to describe me
aint it?
LIKE TOTALLY.

she loves bearbear lots!

always sick :(

2008-02-11T00:45:00.000-08:00

daddy God,
why am i always sick?
I've been really a good girl, eating my meals on time and the right food, maybe yes or maybe not, but Im just getting sick each and every other day and this is really upsetting me and maybe people around me?
because they have to spend extra effort to take care of me, for eg, sweetie sexy mama like jessica, and poor guy who doesnt know how t hold a girl's hands/ arms de chia chia keng or even teh sweetest candice in the world also have trouble holding me
All i had was maggi goreng and all i had later on was rounds and rounds of puking and vomiting and visiting the oilet more than anyone else
man, it was horrid
I tell you the truth
it was HORRID
even mingjay de dear, kok kian have t say why you go toilet so amny times one.
I cant help it la, you see
haha
kinda spoilt my day
but thank God, there's the Lc play later on at 6pm
kinda made my day, cause i love company of friends and i love playing and teasing many many
in an hour's time, i'll just be a good girl, to stay where i am and not move about
haha
kinda anticipating what role are they gonna give me
haha
im really excited leh!
kewl man!
what i heard was, not many people get into Lc play bt the more sadder thing is OL is better, you receive love from teh students you see
not to say despo or what, it just a nice feeling and gesture you know
haha
im very very sure that the tp student union people know about that
esp when their freshie cried after losing the match and went, because i dont wante disappoint you all! and yar, that
sily girl
was
none other than

me.

HAHA

well, it was just me me me, dont dont laugh at me okie.
otherwise i will emo one
haha!
its not a threat.
it was just me me me
HAHA!

first day of school after chinese ney year, man i had a hard time weking up on time.
was late for church on sudnay and almost late for lecture that morning
math lecture, i was veyr attentive until somebody was calling me in wonderland and i hd to fall asleep for awhile and i decided to wake up and take a walk outside to keep myself awake.
and there, the company of fun and super duper nice friends were sitting outside the Lt, so, i couldnt bear living them, decided to sit with them for awhile. HAHA
they're really nice, esp chiachia, mingjay, kok kian(the guy with nice voice), jessica, candice and mayn many more.
They are bunch of awesome friends who wwanted to help me in my studies
well, i dare to say, my studies arent fantastic now, i lost that confidence of mine you see
i really lost it and had no confidence in myself,
let alone in any other test that i took
basically, im fllunking all the test that i had taken and that feeling wasnt nice
IT WAS HORRID
i had to cry because i got two out of thirty even tho i studied for the test
oh god, am i a dumb kid or i dont have brains? or all i had were just pea brains inside my head??
cant be right? to get two out of 30, man, im really on the verge og giving on my stuides
i do not want to,
but i had no smile, no joy, no drive to even study for my next test, cause i do not know how am i going to fare
with friends helping me, it does help to boost my confidence but with that kinda sucky results, it sure make people around me disappointed, and the worst of all, im disappointed with myeslf
maybe this course is not the cup of tea for me
maybe
mayyyyyyyyyyyyybye
God, how can this be??
i just wante do well and do my parents and my preciousGod proud,
nothing else, i promise.
I'll work hard, send more Ga, if you know what i mean
guardian angels to watch over me
for im always sick and hungry and gastric attacks me
heal me o lord
I dont wante see doctor because i think its sucha waste of money and i nv get well anyways
what to do, tell me la, what to do
how man
exams are coming and im sad
emo-ish
someone, pls help me
im desperate to do well
I'll put in all my effort, 200 percent and i'll try to be smart
and i'll not fall asleep anymore

she wante to learn to play canon in d pls
and she wante to have a grand piano of her own.
soonish soon soon pls
oh man. this feeling of failling everything is just so freaky and sucky
God, help me
God, just send someone to help me
EEEE! i just wante to scream from the top of my lungs!!
haiz. sigh sigh sigh
my language is sigh. yours?
but GOd says all things are possible with GOd
yes God, I trust in you

weee oh weeeet
she yearn
she hope
she wish
she dream
everything she can do
she will
and she's willing to
just give her one more chance to be confident of maybe just herself?

help me.
despo emo kid
in need to help from anyone everyone under the sun

dear God, pls heal me and my gastric :(

happy mousey new year

2008-02-06T23:07:00.000-08:00

yoooo hooo!
happy chinese mousey new year people!

hmm
I woke up at around ten plus eleven in the morning sia
hahaha
now Im at my dajie de boyfriend house, using com, paying mew the cat a visit.
somehow or rather, very funnily, his mum is not in, its really paying the cat a visit man
haha new update, eating chicken abalone instant bowl noodle now
feeling kinda happy, listening to the veyr nice song called canon in d
really hope that i can play like him one day
someday
soon
hahaha
i wanne a grand piano also
so, new update, im saving up to buy my own grand piano and elcetric guitar. HAHAHA
then I'll g learn piano man
canon in d here i come man
hahaha
okie go to go. new update lter will have many update cause new year is very bored like totally you know hahahahhahahahahahah

ciao!

I choose to be happy :)

2008-02-04T14:40:00.000-08:00

Many a times I have felt like this
a feeling undescribable within
time after time I have forlorn in it
why can it be?

I Just love this SOng
It is not the human right
open up my eyes to see
be your hands and feet
hey now as we hold to our confesson
woah oh oh
God be the solution
woah oh oh
we will be your hands and feets
higher than the circumstances
higher than
hey now fill our hearts with your compassion
hey now as we hold to our confession
woah oh oh
God be the solution
woah oh oh
we will be your hands and beyour feet
woah oh oh
God be the solution
Jesus
woah oh oh
we will be your hands and feet

ony you can heal the broken heart
and cause the blind the see
set the captives
only you can take the widows cry
be the father to the fatherless
we will be yourhands we will be your feet
we will run this race
we will be our light
we will be your hands
in the darkest place
we will be our light
woah oh oh
God be the solution
woah oh oh
we will be your hands and feets

we will run we will run we will run with the solution

Im very excited with the movement and the MC we already are embarking for this season in our school
It really exciting! she wante to see the whole school touched and LOVED by the almigty dadddy GOD!
man, my heart cant contain it
and she loves giving breakfast to her first person she sees in school
but dont wait for her everyday
its not a everyday thing
otherwise she'll be broke like so so so soonish soon soon

and sle loves this song as well
It had so much meaning to her

The rain just nver seem to bring
the joy ta=hat feel the same
remains
my heart cant seem to learn to part
the mark I drem seems so stark
no i tell myself to hold my breath
but give in

If you gave me one chance to tell you how I was feeling
I would sing to you
and tell you
I wont live my life without you
If you gave me one chance to tell you how I was feeling
I would hold your hands
and look in your eyes
and you know I'll never let you go

The way
you left me on the train
I dont know what to say
I remember everything that day
I cant believe we never dance
just need one more chance to share the sunset on our one romance
no I told myself to hold my breath
a part of me was dying
there was nothing left for me to do now
But give in

If you gave me one chance to tell you how I was feeling
I would sing to you
and tell you I wont live my life witout you
If you gave me one chance to tell
I would hold your hands
and look in your eyes
you know I'll never let you go

wow
she lovedd this song so much
bearbear!

New

2008-02-02T15:52:00.000-08:00

yesterday's youth service was AWESOME.
It not the music or place that attracted me. It the gentle yet strong presence of the almighty God. And after each service, I learnt many new things and felt stronger in my inner man each time. and of course, that unspeakable joy was absolutely unspeakable. HAHAHA. thankyou daddy God! you are real! you are loved! by alice in the wonderland!

stanley stanzai led worship in the youth for the secnd time and tell you man, he's awesome too! I can see, a godly man for God risin up leh!
other than that, erm
I like his hair wor! haha, like he sid, no, our frinch is different. stan one is straight bangs and mine is shuuuuoooottt...like the sound effect he made. HAHAHA, which means slanted one lar. =.= HAHAHA

daddy God, i have to tell yar something!
my life is yours!
I will be your hands and your feet!

didnt blog for a couple of days because too tired la. hahaha. come home every other night the first thing is to eat then SLEEP. HAHAHA. I look forward to chinese new year man. the first day im gonna sleep for 16 hours. Second day my fwens are coming and and and...the l;ast day, time to study. HAHAHA. *excited*HAHAHA! *jump jump jump*

oki. going to pompom and prepare for main service later and a time of refresing with my daddy GOd. and a time to study after service.
IM A NERD! YES ARGHHHH! *excited*/ HAHAHAHA!

and she went laughing laughing and laughing
and smiling genuinely from the bottom of her heart <3

notASHAMEDnotAFRAID

2008-01-30T15:07:00.000-08:00

ItsabrandNEWDAY! :)

nowadaes very poetish
everynow and then have inspiration
seriously, let me me the ang moh LIBAI la

out of that wound Heart God wannes to heal
like the angels to daddy God they yield
forever in wonderland they re not jailed
spreading love like its so real
they enjoyed and allow the world to be filled
with the love and joy that everyone yearns to feel
as the intercessors fell on ground and kneel
prayers are ushered to the highest like smoke from the bbq
and a smile on the king's face was revealed
He said well done, my good and faithful servant, ILOVEYOU :)

ELFreallyhave the gift. It just come out so naturally.she dont have to knock on heaven's doors for words to say. But its really a pity that i do not know how to read music notes. Otherwise, I would have composed many beautiful nice song

[HOSANNA]
break my heart for what breaks yours
everything i am for your kingdom's cause
as i walk from earth into eternity

and she really LOVESTOSING
dont stop her. ever otherwise she'll eat you up

BLING BLING.psycho you psycho me psycho everybody

2008-01-29T22:46:00.000-08:00

elf haven't really think about what I really wish to do, because Im always bounded and restricted by many things around me, in my life. If Im reaally a wonderwoman, able to do wonders.
I would....

wish to learn to play piano
wish to learn to play violin
wish to learn to play drums
wish to learn to play electric guitar
wish to learn to play guitar
wish to be a musician
wish to be a artist
wish to be a writer
wish to be able to see stars
wish to be able to see sunrise and sunset
wish to own a home with library
wish to be studyng in a art school or music school
wish to lose my memory to start my life again
wish to be able to smile happily everyday of my life
wish to be so close with God
wish to have a caring brother or sister(ELDER)
wish not to be judgemental
wish to love the unlovable(POSSIBLE)

may sounds greedy. BUT. These are only my wishes, so, no fret. HAHAHA.
bu yao hai pa bu yao hai pa. HAHAHA.

and there she goes smiling her way thru the corridors of her favourite place, school

given up&heart had no life

2008-01-29T06:15:00.000-08:00

Im very apologetic if my post today is a lil' emo
I was sad and i dont wish to hide
But i had happy times today as well
But i wrote something really nice even tho its sad and really spoke of how i felt at that very moment
you'll see

Title: given up&heart had no life

I felt I have given up
so many times Im not even surprised
It would really be a miracle if i get any of them right
My heart tells me its alright
However how much I try, I still cant deny
sometimes I wonder, am I worse than a fly
But sadly, I wish my results have some life
And the only thing now I could rely
Is to be the best that I like
Cheer up, for life is more than cries
It a life worth living for Jesus Christ
Qualifications does not tell any lies
Just like eyes dot not bluff your life
But all you need to do now is to be strong and believe
there's more than meets the eye
there's more to it like a kite
I wish I can really fly
into a wonderland where angels really flutter and fly
I would really wanne hide
into a cocoon just right for my size
God knows how I feel like my heart had died
In a place where there's no life
And I really feel like I can cry
Anytime, As much as I Like
Dear daddy God, make my heart revive
Make my heart revive

I came up with this in less than 10 minutes. I think i have the gift of writing and thinking and composing. I shall learn to write lyrics nd compose songs, but someone please teach me how to read music notes. then I'll relaly compose songs that make heads nod :)

and she smile with tears in her heart
you'll be okie.
Jesus loves elf! :) weeee!

world changer is elf

2008-01-28T01:07:00.000-08:00

A new blog, because I wanne change.

I wanne to erase sad memories.

I wanne to fill my heart with happy stuff, things that is really worthy of praise and not to dwell in past.

Just really hope that anyone who rads my blog will feel happy like me.

anyone, however strong you are, the word of GOd says,

The joy of the Lord is your strength!

Year two oh oh ate is really exciting.

full of challenges and battles in the mind.

I yearn for God to change and mould me into a better person each day.

I ask and yearn for more strength, to be stronger and really go all out for daddy God.

and right now, at this stage of my life,

ELF Have to say,

Im greatly blessed, deeply loved, highly favored because of God

each time I mention this phrases, I feel lifted up, esp now.

Finally, i Found myself, ultra super extremely gentle, with that gentle spirit.

very open to people's criticisms and very willing to change

sensitive to the Holy Spirit an dreally love to pray and worship the almighty God

always smiling no matter what happens

putting others before her

I wanne to care for others, like Jesus care for me

feel hungry for the lost

putting myself in the shoes of others

smile at the storm

only one thing elf lacks

confidence in my studies

I felt I had given up

A 40 min paper and I did for around 15 minutes

the rest of the time, I slept

like a child deprived of sleep

I wanne be a true fwen to eveyrone

I cant meet up to everyone's expectations

but i try my very best, to be what God wanne me to be

I wont change for others

I will change the world for God has send me to be a world changer

dont WOW or smirk at this sentence because it takes responsibility and maturity seriousness to say this

elf is a world changer!

this song has been in my heart all day Long

I see a generation

Rising up to take their place

with selfless faith

with selfless faith

Hossana

Hossana

Hossana

in the highest

Hossana

Hossana

Hossana

in the highest

Heal my heart and make my clean

Open up my eyes to teh thigns unseen

Show me how you love me

I loved you

Break my heart for what break yours

everything I am for the kingdom's cause

As I walk from earth into eternity

oki. time to goeeee. byeeee.seeee youuueee.

and she leaves her com to MUS.

Test

2008-01-28T00:51:00.001-08:00

ELF!!! ^^ xD